Happy Honorary Birthday Mariney!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARINEY!! YOU’RE THE BESTEST!

Fun Fact: Marine’s Honorary Birthday is celebrated on the 29^th of February, so she only has to have one every four years.

Despite this, I have way too many ideas for birthday presents for Marine to wait four years between them. So mostly I celebrate it on the 28^th.

Well, it’s coming down to the last minute and I’m having a hard time getting a gift. These things are on the top of my list for Marine, but for some reason I can’t find any of them in stores…

A bottle of 100% Grade A fairy dust:

Cool Blogodactyl stickers (aka shameless advertising) to leave in random places or on unsuspecting passersby:

A robot that does your homework:

A copy of the world-renowned, age-old book, The Unicorn Field Guide:

Since I couldn’t find any of that, I decided to make this pretty cool poster out of Pokémon card wrappers.

Remember—it’s the thought that counts! …Right?

Alie Actually Likes Pancakes More

Haiku Time

You can't see my eyes

For today, I am a mop

I need a haircut

The Amazon Wonder Dolphin

Does your life have problems? Solve them TODAY with the one and only...

AMAZON WONDER DOLPHIN!!

How can a simple, pink river dolphin improve your life?

This wondrous creature will EAT. YOUR. ENEMIES.



Other Things Your Dolphin Will Eat:

assorted cheeses,

people who like physics,

donuts,

people who don't like Suicunes,

split ends,

krill,

pizza,

typos,

mold and other harmful substances, and last but certainly not least

Europe (you can't prove it exists anyway)

BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE!

Order within the next five minutes and Blogodactyl will give you absolutely nothing extra!


Kthanksbye.

Reasons Why You Should Love Kakapos

Kakapos are green parrots from New Zealand. They are close to extinction; there are only 120 alive today. Also, they are too fat to fly. Personally, I love fat animals, so this automatically makes them winners in my eyes. But can you honestly say that you don't find it full of overwhelming cuteness that a bird is too fat for its wings to support it? No. You can't.

In addition to their fatness, the noise a kakapo makes is called a skraak. It is the most awkwardly adorable thing I've ever heard. It doesn't even sound like it should be coming from a bird. I mean the word skraak is awkward enough on its own, but once you heard the noise a kakapo makes, you'll understand why. It's fantastic.

My main goal in life is to one day hug a kakapo. I don't think the kakapo would enjoy it as much as I would, but a girl can still dream, can't she?